Stephen King’s It may be screwing with the clowning business (the World Clown Association is genuinely in a lather), but in the Frisco suburb of Dallas, it’s given the owners of Hurts doughnuts a brilliant idea: have a scary AF clown deliver their delicious, delicious treats on September 25 and 26. Do you have a nemesis in Frisco who deserves to wet their pants in fear? Oh, it’s definitely time for them to get a dozen glazed.
In an interview with Guide Live, co-owner Kas Clegg explained the inspiration for the promotion. “We always try to keep up with the trends, and clowns are trending right now. It’s fall, and it’s getting close to Halloween, so we just wanted to spice it up a little bit and do a super fun delivery.” Though there is no explicit acknowledgement that It played a role in motivating this disturbing delivery service, the images of the delivery clown and his bundle of red balloons make the link clear.
Given the priceless revenge value here, the actual cost is doable. In general, Hurts charges five dollars for delivery and clown delivery runs 10 dollars. That plus the reasonable doughnut prices is really a good value for leaving someone who fears clowns in the fetal position (and, hopefully, quivering). Call 469-214-8001 to schedule some horror and doughnuts.
If your enemies live in other Dallas suburbs, you may be in luck in the future. “Side note!” the company noted on their Facebook page. “If we have enough interest in surrounding communities, let us know in the comments below, we may pick a day for out of town clown deliveries as well!” How is there not going to be enough interest? This is evil genius.